One Mandatory Outing!

In the event that you are forced to attend some dreadful social function and 1) Frank can't be your designated +1 2) You need another girl there to balance out the sausage fest or 3) You simply want me there because I complete you-- I will put on pants and go to the thing with you, no ifs, ands, or buts!

*Valid through the rest of your life. Requires 12 hour notice.